Making amends and seeking foregiveness

   In order to express the importance of this story of communication I must first supply some background.  I was 14 years years old and I just got back from my birth fathers house.  He called my brother and I totally drunk and very irrational.  He began screaming at me saying stuff like "you are efin worthless" "you are just an efin loser" to say it extremely mildly.  My father whom I had defended and swore to my mom he was good had just betrayed me bigger than I have ever been betrayed.  Anyways communication was simply cut off.  I had completely stopped talking to him and avoided any attempts at contact he made.  Until fathers day this year.  I waited to post to assure I felt comfortable writing about such a personal and damaging event.  For 18 years of my life I had no communication with my father but for all those years I have preferred to be called a name that not many call me, and he did, Christopher.  I called and said happy fathers day, this is Chris.  He lit up and said Christopher, is this really Christopher.  I had nothing after that to say, for years I had thought about that call and when I made it everything I had practiced and fleeted my mind.  He initiated every piece of the conversation for the first 5 minutes or so.  Making sure I was doing good, how have I been, and most importantly if I fished a lot(as he was the one who taught me).  Then he asked me how it was that he pissed me off, he had been confused and had a stroke and had forgotten some details, also being drunk at the time didn't help.  I told him the things he said and he told me that he was very sorry for the things that he had said and done to hurt me.  I am not sure if I believed him because it is what I wanted or if he meant it.  I really think that he meant it.  Our conversation included laughter as well, which was nice because that never was even a thought I had in all those years.  Active listening was required to ensure that I heard everything right and processed the information accurately.  Had it not been I may have never talked to him again. 
  Throughout the long stretch of time spent not speaking to my father I had assumed the responsibility of trying to make amends within my family, such as my mother and her oldest brother not speaking.  I believe that I had taken on this task because I truly understand how important communication with family really is.  Though I may not have loved my father all those years I never wanted anything bad to happen, and judging by the sound in his voice, the tone in his speech, and the joy in his voice he never for a moment stopped loving me.  I truly wish that all communication could be as gratifying as this conversation with my father (whom has not been called that since that day).